Davetula Konsult

By Princess Nsikak 18 + . . . So this guy invited you to his house. Let's call him your crush. You like him and must have been dying for him to notice you at least. . . He calls and out of excitement you hurriedly rush to his house. But before you do, you went to the toilet to pee without using tissue paper or baby wipes to clean up. You wear your pants and head over to his house. . . Konji things started happening and as you take off your pants, the room's air changed. The air is so bad, his manhood greeted the ground immediately. . . You know, the urine doesn't have a pleasant smell. It stinks ‪#‎sometimes‬ especially if you hold it for long. Now imagine the urine having little drops on your pants. Plus the tight trousers you wear. . . Ladies, you do realize it's very important to clean yourself after you visit the ‪#‎ladies‬  that's how oyinbo call it. Ok! Toilet . . When you pee, do use tissue paper. To me, Baby Wipes is better. It c...

Many Nigerians are guilty of this! . . I ‪#‎USED‬ to have this very good friend. Known him for 5years, though we were on an on and off friendship relationship meaning he ‪#‎was‬ a friend. We did all things together. We ate together. Hung out most times. His friends knew me. My friends knew him. It was cool. We got closer last year, towards the year ending. He frequently came down to PH to see me. He would come down and leave the same day. We will just ate, play, gist and then he's back to his base, another state. . . This year Feb. I saw new photos of him on BBM. New environment, new faces, different skin colors and project things. I checked his BBM profile and instead of the Nigerian flag, I saw UK flag. I checked Facebook, his profile had been updated and there were few changes like Masters at ‪#‎so_so‬ University. How come the changes and I had no idea? . . You see, I said nothing. I acted like I didn't see anything. I turned a blind eye. I stopped liking his p...

Russian scientists claim they are closing in on the key to eternal life. RUSSIAN scientists say they are making progress in adapting ‘eternal’ bacteria to be able to extend the life length of humans. They have accessed the DNA of the ancient Bacillus F, which has survived an incredible 3.5 million years by being locked inside permafrost - soil frozen below 0 °C - in Siberia. Tests on human red blood cells, mice and fruit flies have given promising results. Mice could even reproduce into old age. Click here for full story 

Tunde was so gladdened to have Titilayo's number. It wasn't an easy ride. Titilayo never showed that she wanted to give him her number. To Tunde, She may just be pretending. Who knows? But it doesn't matter again. Beautiful Titilayo would soon be his'. At least, he believed so... . On phone, Tunde sounded sweet. He requested for them to meet, telling her that he likes her a lot. Titilayo insisted that it must be in an eatery. Tunde is broke, but he got a place he can borrow. "No problem, dear,,, ‪#‎TweeterBite‬ would be just perfect.",,,, He aserted. . The D-day came for the date, Titi was in her element. No, she didn't come with any of her friends, but you can say, they may have accompanied her in spirit.lol . She ordered for anything "order-able". Tunde only borrowed 5k for the date. Oh poor Tunde !!! As Titilayo kept on ordering... Tunde was busy calculating the worth of each drink and snacks, as he continually prayed ...

By Princess Nsikak . . I had just finished my junior WASSCE exams and was feeling already on top of the world, like a big girl of course. Having begged mom and dad to please let me go to Ajah to stay with my favorite cousin. . . It was the first time I'd be allowed to stay away for more than 10hours with someone that wasn't them, my parent are over protective like that. This time, I'd be staying for weeks, crazy feeling I tell ya. . . I was the new girl in the block. Fortunately, there were boys my age there. I took over the other girls and I became their enemy, 'wetin concern me?'  There was a group of rich kids then that had young girls like me drooling. Chei! These boys were ‪#‎faaaaaaain‬. I think the killer there was having to see 6 fain boys all at once, they dressed neatly and had british accent, products of British International School. Well sha, I was tripping and wanted one of them, just one. . . You know, these boys had style. They know t...

X-RATED . . . You have a boyfriend but still go over to another man's house. Yes, you don't expect sex but you shaved your pubic hairs. He welcomes you, offers you seat, then beverages or if he's one of those guys that cooks, he cooks for you noodles garnished with eggs and chicken, and if you are like me, you want a big bottle of Pepsi. . . Then he plays a movie. He will never play you an action movie like 24 or Avengers. He plays a romantic movie. Fifty Shades of Grey is perfect. His mind ain't there. He's watching you. And you, in all your mumuness, you are giggling and awwwing. He's listening. When it's a kissing scene, he looks at you and smiles, he's watching your body movement. He's seeing that you are enjoying the kissing scene. . . By now, you must have awwwwed and made a comment on the scene. He moves closer and touches your hair. You giggle and say nothing. Maybe if you had rebuked him, he would stay on his lane but you d...

By Princess Nsikak. HILARIOUS . . . Back then in Lagos, I was still in primary school. When classmates beg Onyinye for her 'Egg'. Her serious reply would be 'sharing her egg means her child won't be whole' and we all believed her. Even in the compound, mothers rarely shared their eggs (the egg we eat o) for fear of having a child that's deformed or not complete. Funny thing is, we (I inclusive) believed it. As I got older, I came to the conclusion they didn't just want to share their eggs with anyone or maybe, just maybe they were made to believe that sharing their eggs would actually lead to an incomplete child, you know? . . After watching Karashika back then, I'd be scared to sleep alone in my room. I'd even run out as soon as the power is off, I'd stay out till one of my parents came back from work. So these kids in the compound told me if I didn't want witches to chase me, I should put salt always in my bathing water. This the...

The Beautiful Banker Who Married A Danfo Driver Chris Ade’s Story: I was an active member of my students union in my days in UNIBEN, from 1988 to 1992, I took a Bsc Economics & statistics degree and then ended up in Elf Petroleum on Kofo Abayomi, Lagos where I worked in the Information Systems and Telecommunications department. This was my invite into postgraduate in Computer Science, which I excelled in with honours. My good fortune changed in 1994 when my contract was not renewed because Elf Was facing an uncertain future in Nigeria. I was just 25 years old and just when I started thinking my life was settling into a nice rhythm, it was punctuated by this unfortunate event. Days turned into miserable months as I couldn’t secure another job. Eventually, I lost my flat and had to move in with a friend. At the time, I had become a committed Christian worshiping in Winners Chapel, Raji Oba, Lagos. I learnt from Bishop Oyedepo that there’s is no food for the lazy so I secured...

Kim Kardashian's current pregnancy has been easier than her first, but it's still not easy. However, the 34-year-old Keeping Up With the Kardashians star, who is expecting her second child with Kanye West, is nearing the end of her second trimester. "She might look amazing, but she doesn't feel that great," a family source told E! News exclusively on Wednesday. "She is often uncomfortable. That being said, she feels much better this time around than she did with North." Kim, who has worn a number of stylish maternity looks in recent months, and Kanye are expecting a baby boy, who will join big sister North West, 2. The reality star is due to give birth in December. Kim had contracted laryngitis toward the end of her first trimester. "So f--king sick today on all levels!!!!!" she had tweeted. "UGHHHHHHHHH I can't deal!!!!!!!!!! Praying I get through the day!" Kim suffered nausea during both of her pregnancies and had also ...

Why Lie?  By Princess Nsikak. This 'handsome' fella moved in newly to our street. The dark version of Ramsey Noah. He stays at the next compound. Not too surprising, he was well known in the street by everyone because of # one thing. So this is what this guy does. Immediately, he enters the street, he starts making this call from the gate to his compound. There are 63 compounds on my street and he lives at 39. So imagine the scene of him always making calls. This has been going on for 7years. . . Picture this, as soon as this guy enters the street he places his phone to his ears, sometimes he uses headset/bluetooth device to talk till he gets to his compound. It's funny because anytime I sight him elsewhere, he doesn't make calls but when he enters our street the calls from # aliens start. . . So one day, I hugged him on his way back and tagged along with him (he's my elder brother's friend). I did this to eavesdrop on this call of his. He was t...

I loved my bestfriend so much but a guy came between us. I loved her. She is very tall and I am the opposite. We are both slim, both dark skinned and almost did think alike. I used to be this girl that would wake up, take my bath, rub my cream, put on sleeveless and trousers, no make up, no powder, no lipstick, nothing. She transformed me. She wanted me to look like a female (she said I wasn't one ). She said you have hot legs, stop wearing your long trousers. Go to classes with short gowns, stop wearing them in the hostel, go out, meet people. I listened to the short gowns part, the makeup part? I took the lipstick part , I don't rub powder, never will. . . I loved her. But I don't love her anymore but I RESPECT her. See, I got nothing against her. I owe her btw, she used to push me to do things. We never should have let a guy come between us, you know? But then, I had to choose between friendship and relationship. . . Don't get it twisted. We weren'...

Homo naledi: New species of ancient human discovered, claim scientists Bones found in South African cave are Homo naledi, a new species of ancient human relative, say researchers, but some experts are sceptical of find. A huge haul of bones found in a small, dark chamber at the back of a cave in South Africa may be the remnants of a new species of ancient human relative. Explorers happened upon the bones after squeezing through a fissure high up in the rear wall of the Rising Star cave , 50km from Johannesburg, before descending down a long, narrow chute to the chamber floor 40 metres beneath the surface. The entrance chute into the Dinaledi chamber is so tight - a mere eight inches wide - that six lightly-built female researchers were brought in to excavate the bones. Footage from their cameras was beamed along 3.5km of optic cable to a command centre above ground as they worked inside the cramped enclosure. Click here for full story

I believe in witches, don't blame me. Blame the witches and what I've seen on the street I live in. . . For those that live in Lagos especially places like Surulere, Mushin, Itire, IyanaApaja, etc. They will testify that most of the landlords/ladies are mostly owned by very old people who may have seen 4 generations but have refused to die. These old people are mostly called witches/ wizards because of what goes in on these compounds and things they do, some fetish things I must say. . . . This is it, I'm not saying this so you believe me. I'm saying what I see, saw and still seeing. Feel free to call it a # fabu but explain to me why it's a #fabu. . . There's a landlord I know. He's over 100. He's my bestfriend's landlord. Every year, one of his grandchildren dies. And this usually happens when he gets sick, immediately they die, he becomes okay. It's a family compound with 2 sections. One section is for the family and the second is...

By Princess Nsikak In the ghetto I grew up in, one woman(mother) stood out from other mothers. Let's call her 'Mama Chibueze'. She's a nurse. My nurse actually. First woman to give me the # drip . And I still have the scars on my hand to show for it. That's how tough she is. I remember vividly how scared I was of her inserting the needle, I was shaking and even in my weak state, I received an unexpected slap from her. The shock waves made me react to the slap and the needle entered the wrong place. My parents were there watching. Tears in my mom's eyes and my dad almost felt like strangling her because he stood up and folded his hand for a punch too. But Mama Chibueze said nothing. . . Ever since that saga, mom and dad got me a new nurse. Mama Chibueze is the first child of 16 children. She's one strong woman I must confess. The only woman that gave birth to all 6 children of hers alone in her room, stood up to clean the room, wash clothes, cook before...

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Episode one Walking into my office in the early hours of Monday 5th January  2015 was this young man. Dark, tall, strongly built and handsome. But one quick look at him, I noticed he was very troubled. He looked very shaken and nervous. I smiled politely, offering him a chair. ‘’good morning sir’’ I greeted, wondering what was troubling such a strong dude this early in the day. ‘’I guess you are Coolval?. The guy I always read his stories online?’’ he asked, forcing out a smile. I nodded, smiling back. ‘’yes sir, but you can call me valentine’’ I replied quickly. He breathed deeply and shrugged. ‘’well I’m here to tell you a story. I’m here to pour out my heart so that you can write it down and share it out to the world . I want people to read my story and probably learn from it. This is a story of love, hopes and betrayal. This is a story that most unmarried guys out there, espec...