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Showing posts from May, 2016

Society : Would you tell if your son-in-law strayed?!

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I have this strong feeling  that Nigerian men are sex mad. This would have been understandable if they were sex starved. But with all the willing partners at their disposal, most of our men have a problem with their raging libido. A few weeks back, I went to a favourite aunt’s place to find out about the last minute preparation for her first daughter’s wedding. Members of the family were all quite excited about this impending wedding. Not only had Joke managed to land quite an eligible guy just when we thought she might end up on the shelf, she just discovered she was pregnant at 34. An icing on the cake. My aunt’s enthusiasm was gone when I called on her. She looked glum and enraged. “Sit down dear,” she ordered when I asked her what the matter was. “You’re the only one I can confide in. You know Joke is expected back any day from now?” I nodded. The happy girl had gone to Britain for a few days, not only to shop for her wedding, but to buy a few things for the expected baby. Y

Society : Teenage children who bring out the worst in you!

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Joyce is a childhood friend I see often. When I called on her a few months back she looked visibly flustered. I was at a loose end and and had gone to see her for our usual natter. “Am I glad to see you,” she said, ushering me into a chair in the kitchen where she was making up different mouth-watering dishes. I certainly had called at a good time. I patted myself on the back, as I tucked in with relish. “Henrietta is back,” she informed as we ate. I looked blank. “You haven’t forgotten all about her have you? Mercy’s second daughter!” The penny finally dropped. Mercy is Joyce’s first cousin. She’s always been close to Mercy’s mother, Louisa, who is her big aunty. A woman-of-the-world, Louisa is the proud mother of three children from three different fathers. Nothing unusual these days where couples exchange partners like goods from a super-market, the snag is that the first and last ‘husbands’ were rich while Henrietta’s father couldn’t be described as a silver-spoon kid. Hen

Religion : Christianity and Alcohol

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By Yolanda kaniki, Is the attitude portrayed by most Christians towards alcohol really defensible? Many Christians would completely forbid the use of alcohol and view consumption of it as being a sin or even an abomination to their belief systems and moral mandate, but do they really have a full understanding of alcohol or is it part of tradition???… Maria and Zotos are Christian parents to 3 beautiful teenagers namely Clara, Marcus and Ben. Clara who is the last born is turning 18 next month and is having a birthday party with only friends and her 2 siblings invited. The siblings have agreed amongst themselves that they will allow alcohol during the party under the condition that it will be taken responsibly and have all sworn to secrecy not to mention a word to the folks. Ben (who’s the first born turning 21 ) said, “Okay guys, we have all agreed that whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, so if anyone dares snitch to mom and dad about the alcohol or anything that they w

Relationships : To The Boo-less Ladies

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Canice Dear lady that is boo-less. Or are you a lady with a boo that you re just managing and using to pass time?lol . Listen to this secret... . . . . . . . . . . There is one smooth guy that is aiming and timing you so that he can walk up to you and woo you. This cute guy cannot come yet Because whenever you re outside your house, You never walk alone. You re always with a friend or a sister. . Guys don't like going to woo babes that are not alone. The witch-craft of their friends is frustrating. Guys, abi I lie? . Lady, Try to be alone whenever you re outside. Going for a wedding? Go alone and stay alone. Stop feeling lonely while in a public place. . No matter how sweet you re looking, If you ain't alone, that cool dude won't walk up to you to say hi. . Ladies turn to "winches" whenever a smooth guy walks up to their friends... I dunno why. SMH

Society : 5 Things Nigerian parents expect from an intending son-in-law

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Nigerian parents expect their daughters to get married someday. However, one thing they are particular about is the kind of man their daughter(s) bring home as a future husband. With more than  250 ethnic groups, with Yoruba, Igbo and Hausa leading the pack, the expectations may be different but they are interwoven and almost similar. These presumptions are largely influenced by culture, religion, heritage, and exposure of the families involved. This said, a would-be or prospective son-in-law should take note of the following tips  if  he wants to be accepted by a prospective bride’s parents as in Nigeria, and the African continent at large, a parent’s blessing and endorsement of a marriage is important. He must be able to care for himself No parent will allow their daughter to ‘marry’ a man who cannot take care of himself. Everything about their relationship is hinged on love rather than the man’s ability to take of the family he will raise. In fact, only a handful of women

Relationships : How much loyalty should you expect from a love rat?

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IT was a bit uncanny. I was at this seminar when a professionally dressed female executive flitted across the room and she reminded me of a younger version of Angela. We were classmates in the secondary school. Very intelligent and a bookworm, she did so well for herself that after getting a good job, she landed a husband that she thought was a catch. But we all knew Rasheed, her husband—there wasn’t any of us he hadn’t hit on. A few had actually fallen under his modus operand!’, fancy presents, cooking gourmet meals and following them around like a lost poppy and giving them the impression that his life would end any time the affair ended. Only, he was always eager to drop his latest find when an interesting piece of skirt showed up. How Rasheed kept his romance with Angela under wraps was a surprise. When the wedding invitation cards surfaced, there was nothing we could do. But I’d been fairly honest with her in the past and tried to warn her of Rasheed’s dalliance with a few o

Society : GENDER ROLE IN MARRIAGE : To Be or Not To Be?

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Canice Without roles, there cannot be organisation in anything done by more than one person. Roles make for efficiency in teamwork. And I dare say that the absence of roles in any setting involving more than one person is an invitation to what an English Philosopher, THOMAS HOBBES, termed as A State Of Nature which entails Human's Inhumanity To A Fellow Human. . Make no mistake about it; The kitchen is necessarily the role of a wife in marriage. Anybody that claims otherwise is living in self-deception. It is the duty of a woman (among other things) to prepare meal for the family always. But then, A time may come when the woman may get incapacitated either through health, work or other responsibilities outside her home, The husband out of love and understanding can take up that role of cooking in order to help his woman and ensure smoothness in the teamwork in the family. This may not in anyway make cooking his permanent role in the family - Rather It may just be a te

Society : Staying Faithful

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Canice Ladies wonder: How Come Men Stay Faithful and Loyal To just One Single Football Club All Their Lives, But Yet, Find It Difficult To Stay Loyal To Just One Single Woman For Life. . Good Question! . Dear Ladies, Imagine This Scenario; . I'm a Die-Hard Arsenal fan, but when Hazard scored agaist Tottenham Hotspur on Monday night, I disturbed my neighbours with shouts of "Gooaaalll". Arsenal did not complain. . Yesterday night, I watched Athletico Madrid beat Bayern Munich with so much ecstasy, Arsenal again did not complain. . Tonight, I will watch and support Real Madrid to demolish Manchester City... Arsenal will not complain again. . This is why it is very easy to be loyal to one club, Our club allows us to taste other clubs once in a while without complaining. That is, whenever we feel like free-styling with other clubs, our club will never complain. . LET'S COME TO OUR WOMEN: . Now, if I marry Binta as my wife, I dare not be

Society : To The Ladies

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Canice To the Ladies: . You hook up with a guy and you guys start chatting... And you get to like him extremely. Then, he invites you to visit him and you were so excited about it. But, now you re worried. You re worried that he told you that he 'll want to have sex when you come... Your mind now be like; "Is it just sex he wants?" . Wake up and pull out the "L" sign from over your neck... He just made it clear to you. He wants a fling or series of it, and there is nothing bad about it, realistically. The ball is now in your court to decide. To visit or not to visit? . A guy that wants a serious relationship with you will never mention sex with you when you haven't visited. Maybe you guys will do it when you come... Maybe you won't, but he 'll leave it at the background pending your visit. . Some mumu guys that want just a fling may still NOT MENTION sex while they build up for the visit, That's how you hear cases of a babe

Society : Sex And The Spirits!!

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Yetunde Arebi Many years ago, there was no GSM and telephone was like gold, owned only by the rich and powerful. In the days when information could not go viral courtesy of the internet, a certain story broke the norm and managed to spread quickly, and it left a great impression on the minds of both old and young. And for many like me, it informed our decision for caution, at least a little, in some of our actions, then and even up till now.    This was in the mid ’80s and as young teenagers, no matter how criminally inclined, or greedy and materially thirsty one was, endangering one’s life wasn't  on the card at all. The story had it that a certain undergraduate, of no particular institution had followed a rich aristo home. After haven been generously paid for her would be services, the aristo opened a big calabash where a large snake was let out. It was the snake that went into the girl and came out again. The aristo later dumped the distraught girl at the gates of her sch

Relationships : Love Out Of Gratitude

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Canice LOVE OUT OF GRATITUDE: A Philosophical Overview. You see... I'm not a fan of our own kind of love cos our harsh economy has so distorted it's smooth sail. . Nowadays, for a man to win over a woman's love, he must do for her, something that would provoke a huge gratitude from her. And how do our ladies show this gratitude? Simple, By agreeing to date us - a reason why we did them that huge favour in the first place. . This is why a lady would tell a guy; . "Why should I come to your house? Why should I allow you to touch me? You haven't done enough for me and you re asking me to come visit you in your house?". . She would never ask herself; "Do I like this guy enough to date him?... If he hadn't done this favour for me, if he still came to ask me to date him, would I have agreed?" She won't ask herself these questions. Rather, She would try so hard within her to kill any love she has for a dude her heart so much w

Relationships : This Leap Year you can go on your knee and propose to your dithering man!

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Bunmi Sofola How do two people who love each other madly actually make it to the altar? When is the moment right for him to pop the question, or would he leave it till never? How do you convince your man you love him enough to want to commit without forcing the issue and scaring him off? In other words, why the heck, after all these years, hasn’t he asked you to marry him? Becky and Obi have been together for over three years and they have a son to show for the union. “When I got pregnant, we didn’t plan it, I did,” ‘Becky confessed. “We’d been very careful about birth-control but I conveniently forgot to take the pill, thinking my getting pregnant would be the right nudge for him to pop the question. I wasn’t expecting anything as dramatic as his going down on bended knee to propose, but a nice line like making an honest woman of me now I was pregnant would have done the trick”. “I was already fed up of explaining our relationship to anybody who wanted to know our status. We li

Society : Husbands who ‘graze’ nearer to home!

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IT was a most harrowing day with the traffic and Rebecca thought she couldn’t handle more stress as she made her way to one of the high-rise complexes she lived in with her family. It was night already but thank goodness there was electricity. As she moved wearily towards the lift, she saw the typical ‘out of order’ sign and she nearly wept with frustration. She lived on the ninth floor! She took her time climbing the stairs until she got to the fourth floor. She met a group of housewives discussing in the corridor and all of a sudden, their eyes were on Rebecca. Some looked hostile but the majority had nothing but pity for her. Then it all came back to her. A few days ago, on a night almost as bad as this one, she’d just made her way to the flat when there was an angry ring at the door. She yanked her door open ready to tell whoever the nuisance was off. when she saw a neighbour with whom she was fairly friendly. “Mama Junior”, she greeted but the woman snorted in reply and

Society : This Could Lead To War!

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Ochereome Nnanna ON Wednesday last week, I was at the Enugu State High Court to attend a session. Shortly before 10am, a large number of prisoners, accompanied by their wardens, arrived. The prisoners’ warden who came to our own courtroom with his wards stood with us in the corridor as the court was packed with lawyers, plaintiffs, respondents, court staff and other interested persons. After a while, a discussion naturally came up about the menace of Fulani cattle herders all over the country. The prison warden who obviously hailed from Enugu State opened up and said the situation in the state was “horrible”. “I went to my hometown last weekend. I was just resting in my room in the afternoon when, all of a sudden I started hearing “hm-hm-hm”. I looked out of my window into my garden. I was shocked at what I saw: cows everywhere! They were eating everything in the garden. I came out and saw three young Fulani men. They were armed with AK-47 assault rifles, the type that we i