Davetula Konsult

Bunmi, It stands to reason that with the spate of divorce the society now witnesses and the number of unwanted pregnancies, single parenthood has come to stay. The sad picture is that, unlike in the old days when single parents were mostly widows who couldn’t be considered young, a lot of single parents today, male and female, are young, intelligent and eager for new relationships. As a bachelor aptly puts it: ‘’There are plenty of single women without children you can date, but let’s deal with the facts: An equally large number of single mothers are no longer with the fathers of their children, and in many cases have never been. Does this mean they are supposed to stay home, stop dating and never meet someone worthy of them or their children? Of course not! So let’s all wake up and smell the realities of the twenties!” He continues: “I admit that not long ago, I would date an attractive, intelligent and humorous young lady, and the moment I found out she had a child, my attit...

COPING with the break up of a relationship you thought would last for ever, especially if you’re the one dumped, could be a living nightmare. Linda, a marketing executive in her early 30s suddenly found herself at a loose end after Linus, her boyfriend of 18 months walked out on her. Two months after, what she termed nothing short of a miracle happened. “It started at a musical concert of all places”, she told me, a lot of sparkle in her eyes.  “I’d gone to drown my sorrow instead of watching TV and feeling sorry for myself. I went to the concert with Babs, my best friend’s boyfriend. I’d planned to go with Buky, my friend, but she was busy and had urged Babs to go without her, and take me instead. “It was a lively but private concert and different types of booze and canape flowed. Babs, wasn’t feeling on top of the world either, and I let it slip how being dumped made me feel inadequate and unsexy. I mean, if I’d repulsed my own boyfriend enough for him to dump me that unce...

Princess Nsikak I had a friend when I was 16years old. He was 26 years old by then. That made him 10years my senior, right? . He wanted me to be his girlfriend. Yes! I thought I was in love. At that time, I thought we would get married, start a family and live happily ever after. . But my mom didn't think so. . She couldn't understand why her last born child and only daughter always sneaked out of the house to see a young man of that age. . One day, after I got back from school. I went to his house and mom traced me there, knocked at his door. The shock he had when he saw my mom made him lose balance because he fell down. . Mom dragged me out by my ears and headed home. No! She didn't beat me but I wished she did. I wanted her to slap me. She didn't. She had other plans up her sleeves . MY mother sat me down and told me wooooooordsssssssss. It made me cry. Oh! I cried. . But it was love. I am in love, So I thought . I kept going back thinking mom w...

. Canice A long time ago in a certain Umudi Village, a girl named Munachi got married and went to live with her husband and mother-in-law. . In a very short time, Munachi found that she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all. Their personalities were very different, and Munachi was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Munachi constantly. Days passed, and weeks passed. Munachi and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting. But what made the situation even worse was that, according to the Igbo tradition, Munachi had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Munachi's poor husband a great distress. . Finally, Munachi could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, so she decided to do something about it. One saturday morning, Munachi ventured to anearby village called Umuokoro village, to see her father...

Ola, Dupe’s husband, now rich – beyond their wildest dreams, has alcohol as his albatross. She doesn’t always know what type of rabbit he’ll pull out of his full magic hat of embarrassments when he’s drunk. The last I witnessed was early this year when the family had a belated New Year party. As the guests left, well fed and merrily tipsy, Ola asked his house guests and a couple of us to finish things off at a night club near the house. I would rather have preferred to go home and sleep off a throbbing headache, but Dupe’s pleading eyes made me shrug and I left with the group. Ola was a bit tanked up by now. His speech was slurred but the problem with him is that he doesn’t know when he’s had enough booze. At the night club, he wasn’t drinking his beer, he just tilted his head and drained the stuff. What was the enjoyment in that except to really get drunk? By the time we left the night club, we were all legless and I decided to sleep in one of the children’s rooms. I’d hardly put...

THE scene was set for seduction. The dining table almost creeked with artistically crafted food dishes all wafting appetizing aroma. The plates were patterned Wedgewood and the spoons pure stainless steel with gold tips. A bottle of wine sat in a bucket at a corner of the table, and Jola, the hostess, was a sight to behold. She had on a negligee without bothering with a house-coat, and her two breasts stood up defiantly. Even in her mid-30s, her boobs belied the fact that she’d had two children. “My late husband never encouraged me to breast-feed,” she explained, “he said my breasts were solely for him and since infants have alternatives, I should feed my kids on the best brand of baby milk. Money was no problem afterall … “ In a corner of her tastefully furnished living-room sat Frank. He too was in his 30s; a single father. Jola became widowed a few years ago. A part from the money her husband left for her, she is a woman of substance in her own right and of almost impeccable pe...

You do, don’t you?   Yes, I do . And you said so in the presence of a hundred or more people as witnesses. Then you hosted an Owambe to drive home your point. You are sentenced to ‘ death’. Till death do you part. Then things begin to fall apart. But should you kill each other with your bare hands? Are men really made that way? To kick things around? Blame her mouth. Of course, everybody knows she talks too much. But you should have known that her mouth runs like tap water and she would never stop offending you with her words and, indeed, that’s why you should learn to be partially deaf. Little things are breaking homes. Men are killing their wives over flimsiest reasons. Everyday, people are fighting with their significant other over insignificant matters . You now begin to hate the one you love. You were not really sure initially. Or how can one love and hate the same person at the same time? Love can be a good thing though, but it can also turn a seemingly stable p...

AS to be expected, the current economic melt-down has created a lot of people who grapple with the menace of the credit crunch— not only have they lost their jobs, the prospect of finding any other, not to talk of one commensurate in remunerations is zilch! When Eunice, a personnel director of an insurance company was asked to reduce the work force by a third, she felt like a real hatchet man. “It was a most heart-wrenching experience doling out retrenchment letters and watching the bleak expressions on the faces of staff who have lost their jobs,” she said sadly. A few weeks later, it was her turn to get the dreaded ‘golden handshake.’ In her wildest dreams, she never even believed she would get the chop. “One morning’ she alleged:”My boss called me into a meeting. ‘I m sorry,’ he said, not quite catching my eyes, ‘the company’s in a bad shape here as you know. We have to let you go’. I drove home in a terrified daze. I’d come to work that morning with an official driver. Now, I h...